Now the coincidences are way too unbelieable Curtze died this 26 december

One of my father Captain Frederik Nyborg Christensens friends from the military occupation administration in Germany at Bremerhaven, has recently died:

FROM: The Erie Times-News ~
Rear Admiral Charles A. Curtze Retired age 96, of West 38th Street, Millcreek, died Wednesday December 26, 2007 at his residence.
He was born April 8, 1911 in Erie at Hamot Hospital a son of late Edwin H. and Henrietta Kraus Curtze and he was grandson of Charles A. Curtze, founder of C.A. Curtze Company, Erie, Pa. Residing at 135 East 7th St., he attended Jones Elementary School, Gridley Junior High, and graduated from Central High School 1928. Being an exchange Rotary Club son in Scandinavia led ..

Last time Curtze came to visit us in Denmark, was around 1970 to bring home a newly built sail yacht thru the Kieler canal and on to America.
I was scheduled to go onboard as supernumerary crew (at age 12 i think) but it never happened.

Clearly Curtze loved the boat:

Goerie.com During his retirement, he designed and commissioned his sailing yacht, Thule, in Germany, which was completed in 1970. He and his wife sailed it back to the U.S., and it was berthed at the Erie Yacht Club."He loved that boat," Frew said.

During our USA visit in 1967 we visited the Curtzes, who as I recall, then lived in the DC , when we were travelling through Washington DC. My parents went to the National Archives there as well.

I wonder what they were looking for ? It could have been my uncle Gerhard who disappeared in the US during the first part of the 20th century, or possibly the Andews family whom my fathers aunt Frederikke (Niko) Nyborg of the teacher C. Nyborg Family visited.

She and her friend Andrews travelled on the 'United States' through Ellis Island in 1923.

So she left a trail in the archives of Ellis Island. Amazing.

But still: Is it just a coincidence that Curtze dies within a few days of my sister Inger Savoth Nyborgs memorial service at Holmes Kirke??

Saying farewell to Inger and not knowing what future will bring

Today I have paid homage to my father Captain (Kommandørkaptajn) Frederik Nyborg Christensen, said farewell to my sister Inger Nyborg Savoth at her grave and prayed for their souls.
They may need it, but definetely not because of a divorce, more likely because of fitting the truth to the circumstances.

Strange that Ingers mother Hilda Nyborg Christensen had a headstone, which was almost completely a copy of the one my father was laid to rest below in 1972. Do You suppose she visited his grave before she herself died. I would not be surprised at all.

As You may know, my father had two children, me Jens Frederik Nyborg and Inger, bestoving on them the same love and kindness and learning them in turn about family, country, honour and honesty.

He may have had two wifes and two families, but he did NOT fail in doing what he could do.

But some other grown up people around the kids may have been wanting in openness and fairness, and should have been better off befriending one another.

The result, pending, is that a sister and a brother never got to know one another and learn their differences and sameness. A nephew has lost an uncle. Did anybody gain from that ?.

Due to stiff conventions and jealousy possibly, I have lived most of my adult life without the support of my fathers family, and if not my sister had decided to be buried in our country, I might never have found out.

I have now, and have learned of a very nice lady being the best friend of my sister, also having known of the Nyborg family, particularly my father. I am deeply thankful.

She was even a friend of one of my mothers best tennis friends Ellen Bastiansen, mother of tennisplayer Peter. So the world can be a close place and we can support one another, just by showing simple courage and responsibilty to one another.

My father Frederik learned me and my sister of this, being himself warm, open, courageous reliable and a supporter of his friends, fighting sometimes for what he thought was right, salvaging together with the crew of Royal Danish Naval frigate Hvidbjørnen the reamains of 'Pourquoi Pas', Charcots expedition ship, off Akranes at Reykjavik, fighting in Holger Danske during WWII.

If he married two women, so be it, only it would have been nice if they all ccould have kept their peace, as more and more understand to do it, particular in the Scandinavia that always valued the rights of men and women alike, from the Viking to todays societies of equality and freedom.

Thu Nordu... du fra norden. I am proud of being that, and so will my girl, Maria , Frederik Nyborgs granddaughter, partly because of the gift of love he gave me.

Family is family, and my life is definetely better for knowing

I have become wiser and maybe a bit saddened by realising that oldtime conventions and beliefs about the sanctimony of marriage, still has the potential for creating hurt.
Even for events taking place in 1945, 1957, 1958 and 1962.

Due to this I may have made my nephew feel I have invaded his privacy, though unwittingly.
On the other hand sharing ones experiences in a Blog, will have the potential for others to know of those thoughts.

My sister Inger, whom I have learned a great deal about during this christmas season, my Mother Else and probably my dad as well, have bent the thruth to fit their conceptions and inner beliefs, but dont we all ?

Inger has, even after writing with me, when our father died in 1972, denied that our father remarried with my mother Else in 1962, both Else and Fred hid that they were only married after knowing one another for 17 years, my mother particularly giving a wrong impression of Ingers mother Hilda, letting her be the reason my father could not divorce before.

So Else was not fair to Hilda when telling me about her, probably forced things by becoming pregnant with me of course.

Thus I also have an experience of my dead mother being considerably less than perfect.
But god rest her soul, I will allways love her, even now 11 years after she died also at age 81.

Hilda herself was fairly positive, knowing with herself she had had a long number of good years with Frederik. Maybe both women should have been able to realise they actually HAD something in common. Both love for, and a child with the same person.

Frederik, my father, on his side very probably made it possible for Hilda to stay in their common home in Nyboder all the way to 1962.
That she in the process was awarded the state naval pension, was probably very fair, and this may also have been good for Inger.

Musing about dead relatives motives and inner beliefs is difficult.

I have been very happy talking to Inger Agerlin who, as she rightly said, now is the only person who knows the whole story. For this I am very grateful.

I know my father was very happy about Inger, loving her as much as he did me, this is something I could hear and feel, and I believe he has acted as well as he could to atone to Inger and Hilda, giving me and my mother a very good existence, by working very hard for so many years after his actual pensioning.

I am actually very happy that I know that Inger and I shared the same father and the same love for him. He, Frederik on his side, was a loving and caring, and equalminded - very much so for his generation - parent, who had learned to give and share love and kindness, respecting women and men equal.

The way he told about his parents, I know where those fundamental beliefs came from.

Inger has hidden that I existed and never told our father divorced Hilda. Well, if she needed that, so be it. I think we are all a bit stubborn in this family.

On the other hand she MUST have known, having a public service held in Holmens Kirke, would be a message to the family, and by doing so, she has allowed me to learn of my familiy on her side, and on Knuds side.

I have seen pictures of Vike and of Inger, and I have talked to Jens, Knuds son. learning that we all really do share looks, feelings and some personality.

Ever since having my daughter 8 years ago I have looked for my relatives, to know where we fit in the world. I am very happy for knowing that we live and that we have lived as family.

It would have been nice if Inger had been able to break the wall, when she last was in Denmark 6 years ago, then we could have met and my daughter Maria could have known Inger.

But now Maria will indeed know the story, and that counts for something.

I'll leave this, hoping that Vike and I may be able to get to know one another sometime

http://home13.inet.tele.dk/jnyborg/

I need just a little bit of love

It is strange how things can change. This first january have seen my mood go from elation to mulling over family arguments.

I have learned of my fathers family again after far far too long time by my sister having died in New Jersey, and having a service held in Holmens Kirke, wherby I could find my lost cousin Jens.

The downside is things just dont go happy all by themselves...

I have looked for a real engineering job for some time now- being 50 and using a hearing aid, may not help, but it should be no problem. It has not been so in so many other jobs.

Our economy is of course stressed by three months of uenployment benefits, but we will manage, since I found a job, but right now I think its too early to be really happy. Maybe I just sound doubts it will hold. But then again the job is professionally very interesting being with C#. Lets see.

All these things will take some load on anybody.

But WHY cant I be allowed to just simply be a bit miffed by my wife not being entirely pleased with how much or how little of the christmas tree I've taken down, being a bit more insulted by my cooking not being good enough for a hungover stepdaughter, who desired sausages, but forgot to tell me so.

I made the damm sausages too, and rationalised why the lady in point needed them.

Morale ? There is a reason the chinese sign for unrest is two women under same roof.

Good that Pia and I came closer when Maria came, and I was so happy I got a hug when she came back from Ecuador. Maybe this time we can really reinforce our relationship...

Or maybe not.... Maybe things go up and down, maybe I should just ignore her temper, but unfortunately I am not very good at faking my immediate reactions.

Come to think of something VERY good: Even if Pia is 18 years her kid sisters senior they know and love another, and they will always know they have one another.
This must show we have become a bit wiser, after all- it doesnt matter to them they have two different fathers.

New Years Eve

Finally New Year 2008.

After taking a trip to the forest at Buresø

with Maria and her friend Anna, who now lives near Silkeborg, I went home to prepare the party cooking baked-in chicken, ovenfried veal and boiled potatoes, with canadian lobster as my starters.

It looked great, I wound up wearing my fathers old kitchen apron the whole evening. Like him , I enjoy cooking.

Meanwhile I thought a lot about my sister in America, my 'new' nephew, and my cousin on Uncle Knuds side. Strange that we have the same name, and more strange that we write and speak similar. Jens is 13 years my senior, but I think Knud and my father Frederik had a lot in common, even if they were physically dissimilar.

I havent heard from Vike, but hope I do. Meanwhile I'll write a letter to Inger Agerlin Petersen who, more coincidences, lives right next to Østre Paradisvej in Holte where my mother and father had their first meetings together, going to Reprisen theatre in Holte.

She can then, if the chooses to, forward my adress to Vike. I cant guess if there has been bitterness about my mother as fathers new wife.

I know her name, too, I wonder if my once girlfriend Alices aunt at Rudersdalsvej had known her ? Sometimes the area of Holte comes up too often considering I did not grow up there at all.

Happy new year once more